Positive Affirmations for Happiness
“All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.” ~Buddha
I used to have a bad boss, I mean a really baaaaaad boss. She threw tantrums (and objects), screamed, cried, called in the middle of the night, and somehow manipulated me into thinking she really cared about me. I worked for this woman for six years.
I can look back now and understand that it was the toxic environment that was making me unhappy. At the time however, I didn’t see a clear way out of the situation. I liked the work I was doing and I liked the pay and the people I worked with but the stress and anxiety that my boss created was affecting my health and sanity.
It was at this point in my life I was introduced to positive affirmations. I started seeing a new counselor* and she recommended I start using positive affirmations to manifest the life I wanted to live.
What are Positive Affirmations?
An affirmation is positive self-talk, phrased in the present tense as if the statement were already fact.
Example: I am empowered and uplifted by the work that I do.
The above affirmation was not the way I was feeling when I worked for the boss from hell. But by saying this affirmation everyday before I left the house, I felt a sense of hopefulness that I would find work that empowered me.
Our thoughts impact our words and actions. In order to create actions that are desirable we must first think thoughts and speak words that produce positive good.
This means that we must be conscious of the words we speak. These words (and thoughts) will affect our actions. Positive affirmations help reprogram our brains in order to truly believe that positive outcomes are possible.
Affirmations help us believe that our actions will manifest our desires. Stating our wishes out loud can provide reassurance that in fact our wishes can come true.
Sometimes positive affirmations don’t work. If for example, I loose my cool and yell at my kids and then turn around and verbally tell myself “I am a calm mom,” that’s not reality at that particular moment. At that moment it’s a flat-out lie.
Because I’ve been practicing positive affirmations for many years I can phrase it that way and receive a positive boost because I know that I am actively striving for calmness in parenting. If however I was saying an affirmation like that and doing nothing to manifest the way I truly want to parent, it would be a complete failure.
For some, a better way to frame the positive affirmation would be, “I love my children and am continuously working towards being a calm mother.”
See the difference?
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Once you start repeating positive affirmations on a daily basis you will become more conscious of negative self-talk. Once you are aware of them, you can change negatives to positives. This is turn will guide your actions and manifest your happier life.
The trick is to say the affirmation be in the present tense. I am doing…My body is… I’m good at, etc. Instead of, I will be… I hope to, etc. It’s an active vs a passive voice. Using the term “I will” puts your affirmation in the fuzzy future. Using an active, present tense manifests your positivity now.
Some Positive Affirmations to Get You Started
I’ve listed some positive affirmation books below but a simple google search will also pull up plenty of positive affirmations to get you started.
Here are some affirmations I find helpful:
- I love my life.
- I feel whole and complete.
- I am respected.
- I am strong; I am indestructible.
- My future is bright and exactly how I envision it.
- Many people appreciate what I have to say. People look up to me.
- My fears are drifting away.
- I control my life; I am in complete control of my destiny.
- I am endowed with endless talents and I use them for good.
- My mind is calm, my body is strong.
- I do not succumb to negative thoughts or actions.
- I am enough.
- My life is full of love.
- Think about five areas of your life that needs your focus.
- Then, in your workbook or journal write down 5 positive affirmations to go along with the areas you want to work on.
- Your affirmations don’t have to be perfect, you can always tweak and change as you become more familiar with them.
- Google some affirmations relating to your chosen area if you’d like.
- Once you have your five affirmations, say them to yourself out loud.
- Try to repeat each affirmation during the day at least twice.
Remember to verbally say your affirmations a few times a day. Pay attention to how you feel when you say them. Do they empower you? Do you feel silly? Listen to those feelings and tweak the affirmation until it feels comfortable to say. Then, when negative thoughts enter your head or you catch yourself saying negative words, recite your affirmation and reprogram you brain to think positively.